Want to Reduce Domestic Abuse and Violence?

MORE THAN A 'RESPECTFUL RELATIONSHIPS' CLASS WILL BE NEEDED TO DO IT.

It's great that the current Australian government is so committed to reducing domestic abuse and violence. I'm concerned that some may be thinking the addition of 'Respectful Relationships' sessions to our classrooms is the means to do it.

Any program that will inspire lasting change has to be more comprehensive than a set of lectures added to sex education classes or a policy change in the sports program.

I realise the 'Respectful Relationships' components are intended just as a start to a more widespread effort.

Yet even if these sessions are well done and inspirational, they won’t be enough. There have to be forces in place to help lessen the overwhelming influence of parents’ relationships, the material that young people see on television and the huge amount of flotsam cramming the internet.

If you also consider the influence of materials at the newsstands and the impact of important persons in the children’s lives (who haven't taken these new lectures and may not support the values), the view becomes even dimmer. ‘Uh oh’ is the politest way to put it.

After all, this sort of thing has been tried before. It's not fresh. It's not new. And it hasn't been shown to be effective in significantly altering the health of personal relationships over time because it's not broadly supported.

If you're talking about teaching children in the schools, the influence has to last long enough to impact the dynamics of their future relationships. They need something that won't rub off once the holidays begin. They need a structure they can draw upon consistently for the rest of their lives.

This means we need to teach young people to identify the foundation that underlies all forms of abuse, not just prohibit verbal abuse and violence. This includes sexist ideas that deem women inferior to men, perceive females as the property of males, or place females in the role of sexual objects.

We're already seeing the impact of that thinking among young people, with the 'sexting' of nude photos by young girls to their friends, and young females allowing themselves to be widely sexually exploited by males. This limiting role of females underlies the sense of ownership and entitlement maintained by abusive and violent males. And it's being supported and maintained by both young women and young men.

If we want to reduce abuse and violence, we have to show the limitations of this thinking to both girls and boys. These new values have to be echoed in the wider environment, too. This includes the internet, the media (including magazines and newspapers)and other sources of influence around young people, whether these sources are obvious or subtly in the background.

And it should also aim to have an impact on the relationships of at least some of the important persons around young people. That means the offering has to be broader than just the schools, even as a starting point.

Then it all has to be repeated, reinforced and presented in a variety of contexts.

It can be done. It MUST be done if we’re going to reduce the proportion of girls and women experiencing this horrible phenomenon. But we can’t make a new cake by using the same old recipe. We have to be willing to break new ground, be courageous and comprehensive, and go at it with everything we’ve got. No more half measures will do.